I would really like to be kind, but this was one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. I had read that the movie parodies several 80s movies including my favorite, Back to the Future. Unfortunately, there was no sign of Marty Mcfly or Doc Brown, and I wish I had access to the flux capacitor to go back in time and get my money back.
Part of me wanted to write a great review of Be Kind Rewind so you guys could share my misery. If you go to rottentomatoes.com it seems many of the reviewers have gone this route. Don’t fall into the same trap as me; this movie is hideous.
I knew we were in bad shape when all five previews were terrible. For some reason they all focused on the UFC; even David Mamet (of GlenGarry Glen Ross fame) is writing about ultimate fighting. If we’re gonna have a new line of Bloodsport’s at least bring back Jean-Claude. Suffice to say, Redbelt, Never Back Down, and Run Fat Boy Run, did not put us in the right mood for comedy. (It was like the time Homer performs stand-up at Mr. Burns birthday party. Right before he goes on, Smithers announces: "A small puppy much like Lassie was run over in the parking lot. And now the comedy styles of Homer Simpson."
HOMER: "Are you ready to laugh?!")
I won’t bore you guys with the details, but instead I’ll pontificate about indie comedies vs mainstream ones. Let’s say I saw Semi-Pro which I heard is pretty dreadful. At least with a big box office comedy, I am guaranteed a few things: hot girls that could possibly get naked, celebrity cameos, and maybe a few choice lines I can quote at parties when I’m drunk. What does a bad indie comedy offer? Nothing; I actually felt violated when I left the movie. Like someone touched me in the bathing suit area without permission. It was a pretty awful feeling. My buddies GS and JM both displayed that combined look of pain, confusion, anger, and shame. Then they turned on me for choosing the movie. But at least our moods improved as we bashed it. And my friends were excited to know that their initials would be dropped in my next blog.
I eventually apologized to my friends for dragging them to such an atrocity. They were cool; much more understanding than my family. I still remember/repress convincing my family to rent The Limey on Thanksgiving several years ago. My Los Angeles friends assured me it was outstanding. What they failed to tell me was by "outstanding" they meant artsy, hard to understand, and painfully boring. My family hated the movie and thus hated me for a breif period. My movie rental privileges were banned for several years. My family finally let me rent another movie last year, but my ban was reinstated for choosing Baby Geniuses 2. Doh!
Johnny English Rides Again
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